Six Words No Instructor/Trainers Wants To Hear

by Cheryl Childs/Cheryl Childs Horsmanship

There are six little words that can strike terror in the heart of a trainer/instructor. You ask what those six little words are - well they are  "I was talking to a friend,". You see those six words are generally followed by "and he said I should......" and with those few words uttered in a matter of seconds months of hard work by the rider, the horse and  myself are undone. When those words come out of a client's mouth I brace myself for a deluge of advice from that friend who apparently believes they know more than a professional trainer/instructor. It also seems that this friend doesn't support their friend (my client) in her need to improve her horsemanship, build a better bond with her horse, become a more confident rider or improve her horse's overall training. This friend seems to be opposed to their friend (my client) expanding her horizons and trying something new with her horse as well.

This advice giving friend always seems to have the answer to any problem someone is having with their horse. Their answers are usually as follows "you just need to ride him longer and harder on the trail" or "you need to get spurs - he's just lazy" or "you're wasting  your time with that stuff like collection or balanced horsemanship because you're just a trail rider - just ride", but wait my favorite of all of them  is " just get back up there, he's fine, let's go". That last word of advice is probably the most dangerous piece of advice anyone can give you. All joking aside if you have a friend or friends who gives you advice like that you need to find new friends.

I have heard it time and time again, "My horse spooked and I got nervous, but my friends told me to just ride it out and that's when I came off,".  My advise as an equine professional is if your horse is spooky or acting strange do not be too proud to climb down - it's always about your safety and also your horse's safety. There is no shame in walking your horse home or back to the trailer and arriving in one piece. I have had clients who were seriously hurt when someone told them to "ride it out". I have also had clients who didn't get physically hurt, but had their confidence was shaken so badly they almost gave up riding.

As for that friend's advice about not needing to improve your riding skills because you are a trail rider, well I say that's a load of manure. Every rider, whether they are on the trail or in the show ring, needs to be the best rider they can be, so their horse is the best he can be. You need to be balanced in the saddle when you ride on the trail for your safety and your horse needs to know how to change leads and collect on the trail. There is nothing wrong with improving your horsemanship and your horse's training - even if you are a trail rider.

So to all those friends out there with all that good advice here is some advice for you - if your friend wants to take lessons to improve her riding skills, wants to work with a trainer or wants to try something new encourage her - don't undermine her. Don't give her advice that might get her hurt and shake her confidence so badly she stops riding. Be a real friend and encourage her to dismount and you do the same. Lastly please don't give her advice contrary to the instructing and training she is receiving from me.